D Dennison

Voices Take Flight

Category: Blogs (page 1 of 2)

Getting Your Steps in, What a Scam

Oh hold your horses, I’m not trying to stop the walking revolution. I’m not even trying to make the world a chubbier place so that I can feel more comfortable in my skin. Hang tight and we’ll discover what I mean together, literally. I know in my head what I mean, but let’s see how clear I can make this brain hot tub come to a true thought revealing moment.

I have friends, associates, and neighbors who challenge each other on daily steps. I see many of them on Facebook talking smack to each other about steps and bragging about how many they got compared to the entire world. Yes, the entire world, the internet is like that, competition is big. Even in my own house, I have heard these words, “don’t forget to get your 10k miles in today” I would say, when did this obsession and need and drive for 10k steps a day start, but there is the internet and within 15 seconds I could answer my own question, but seriously.

We know why people are obsessed with the 10k a day mantra and we know that the greatest benefit and reason has nothing to do with your weight. Okay, maybe that isn’t entirely true, but it does, in part, resemble the truth. The biggest benefit to walking 10k a day is what it does for your heart and hypertension. It is said by more than one that the health benefits are greatly beneficial, especially to those with already diagnosed heart-related issues or those who may be at risk. In fact, walking could reduce a cardiovascular event by as much as 31%. I believe this important to mention because I don’t want you thinking that I am going on some tyrant and proposing that walking, in general, is a scam, I do not believe that and do understand all the good walking brings to a body.

If your main goal for walking and trying so hard to get in your steps because you are looking to drop loads of weight, then that is where the ‘scam’ lies. Did you know that 10k a day, on average, only burns about 500 calories. However, not everyone has the same results or better put the same calorie burning furnace. In reality, you can burn as little as 400 calories or less depending on your weight and stride. Well, I’ll be, that sounds good D, why are you complaining? Here’s the skinny, that number, 400 calories or even 500 calories represents 10k steps, but not universal steps. When trying to lose weight you’ll have to monitor your caloric intake, don’t say duh, some think that because they are walking they don’t have to. So, here it is, if you walk 10k steps a day, every day, and reduce your caloric intake, you could lose a pound plus some ounces each week. The average person walks about half of the 10k goal on a daily basis. 5k steps burn approximately 248 calories. The best advice is to walk as much as you can every day, watch your calories and incorporate other exercises as 10k a day isn’t enough activity to help you lose weight, overall.

Just for fun, let’s look at a comparison of steps versus bites.

  • 1 Big Mac = 12k steps
  • 1 Donut = 6k steps
  • 1 Taco = 8k steps
  • 1 Chef Salad = (about) 16k steps
  • 1 Slice Pepperoni Pizza = 7+ thousand steps

Keto Takes Away the Krap!

Keto has taken the world by storm. Everyone wants to date him, wrap him up, take him home and pose with him in the mirror. But Keto takes away the Krap.

We start this journey with full transparency. I went out with Keto for a while. I sat on the side of a little dirty and not real strict, at first. Honestly, I couldn’t figure out the math, I guess Linda Mell didn’t really help me out in Mr. Johnson’s math class after all. (I am pretty sure it was Linda if not, I am sorry for throwing you under the bus) I achieved minor success, 9 lbs, and enough inches to notice in clothes, not out of clothes. I’d like to say that this motivated me to be less dirty, but it really was a long trip to Kentucky and Iowa hanging out with burgers and the best pizza in the world that really pushed me to try and figure out the math.

6 months-ish, remember, I am not a mathematician, into this Keto relationship, I found an App that seemed to have real promise in helping me to figure out how to eat. I logged and I logged and I logged some more. I followed my macros to the T, 97.9% of the time. Guess what happened??? Want a hint? The answer rhymes with, um, I don’t think nothing rhymes with anything. But that is it, nothing happened. I’m sorry, I did feel less bloated, I was no longer physically inflamed, just mentally because nothing was happening. My mind was a wreck, I complained on the inside and on the outside. I yelled at my eggs, my spinach and my salads the size of a human head. As you can imagine, that didn’t really help either.

I had started this journey with Keto because I wanted to be 20 to 27 pounds thinner, get healthier and see if my blood pressure, it’s a through the roof kind of blood pressure, would get better. Oh, and I had a trip to Mexico for my ‘nieces’ wedding at the end of March, (I started the beginning of August). Yes, March has come and gone and chubby me sported my suits like I always do, but inside I was really missing the success of everyone, or so it seems, on Facebook that have lost a million pounds in 3 weeks and blah, d blah, d blah. The pages I followed would talk to seemingly other people like me who didn’t feel very successful in their relationships with Keto. The successful people reminded the unsuccessful people that everyone is different and we all make it through this journey differently. That is like saying some peeps are rich and some aren’t. I would even seek out successful people and ask them to just tell me what they were eating so that I could copy it, you’d think that I was panhandling outside of McDonald’s asking for a buck or spare change. Crazy how people in this Keto relationship are so protective of what they actually eat. Yes, there are exceptions, just like with wealth and toilet paper.

We started out talking about how Keto takes away the Krap. I was trying to be transparent by telling you, I am basically a jilted lover of Keto. I heard about him, I met him, I hung out with him and we parted ways. I just want to be clear, my view is tainted. Keto, however, does take away the Krap. I know this because of the forums I follow about Keto. Everyone, basically, talks about the same 3 things… how much weight they are losing, is there a good substitution for sweets or crunchy things, and the fact that they just can’t poop. If you think about it, it’s like a real-life relationship. In the beginning, you lose weight, don’t really eat sweets and crunchy things and you just can’t poop with them around.

In closing, obviously, I am just trying to find the humor in the fact that Keto didn’t work for me and laugh at constipation. By the way, if you are on Keto and have lost weight, good for you. If you can’t find a substitution for sweets and crunchy things, it’s only because there really aren’t any true substitutions and if you are having trouble pooping, mostly I hear, taking a Magnesium supplement helps. Carry on, enjoy your swimsuits, I will be the lady under the palapa in the turtle neck and sweats. (Just kidding, if you know me, chub or no chub, I am woman hear me roar, I will be on the beach in my suit, just please don’t stand too close to me if you have lost your 20 pounds.)

Play

Travel to Paris: 1 Week, 2 People, 3 Meals a Day for 2k!(PICTURES)

I love to travel and can’t believe that I have only been doing it for12 years. Just as incredible is the choice of my first destination. I had planned a trip to Maine for years, it kind of became a calming hobby. When my James and I first met he asked if he could take me on a vacation, anywhere in the world, I said Bar Harbor, Maine. He was amazed that I answered so quickly (AND) that I said, Maine. He repeated, I did say anywhere in the world, I acknowledged that I had heard him properly and said again, Maine. Once returning from Maine, whale watching, sea kayaking, and a 100-year-old lobster (viewing, not eating), I was hooked on traveling.

I share with anyone and everyone that I can about traveling. I think that I like to talk about it as much as I like to actually do it. The number one response about traveling that I hear is that they would like to travel ‘someday’. A lot of people say that they have always wanted to go to Greece, Paris or Italy. Some locations can be expensive to get to and some can be expensive while you’re there. The magic of traveling is not magic at all, it’s merely teaming yourself with the tools to make it happen.

When planning a trip, it’s important to look at a few of the essentials details. Don’t stop reading, this process will never be like studying or taking a physics exam. The most important thing to look at when you decide to put your dream into motion is when you’d like to go, and for some it boils down to when you can take a trip. There is a bit of strategic planning when deciding what time of year that you will travel. Most people assume they will go in the summer, did you hear me, MOST people. If one plus one does truly equal two, then you should realize then that the summer months will cost you more money, typically, to make your dream of travel come true. Looking at it another way will help, remember the old adage, ‘supply and demand’, travel will also follow this rule.

We like to travel in the shoulder season. The most enjoyable time to travel is in September. We like to travel in late spring, late summer, or early fall because you will still have many of the amenities available to you. Most shops are still open, transportation continues to run quite frequently, and the restaurants, as a whole, are still open and serving delicious foods. We have found that the most enjoyable time to travel is in September.

In 2017, we took to the skies for Paris. We found round-trip airfare for $350 each. The fare was too incredible not to take advantage of and although we hadn’t really decided exactly what we wanted to do or where we would want to spend our trip it seemed like the thing to do. See, we were to meet my James’ brother in Greece. It was actually the cheaper route to fly into Paris and grab a flight to Greece from there for $135 per person. Once we had gotten our fill of sand, sun, and 4-wheeling all over Mykonos, we set our sights on Italy. The fare from Mykonos to Rome was stupid silly, $66 per person. As you can see, with fares like this to get to Europe and the low fares to travel within Europe once you are there, there is no reason to keep pushing this travel thing off.

Croque Monsieur and Croque Madame (w/egg on top)

Airfare seems manageable, or so it seems from what I have said before, but what about the nuts and bolts of the whole deal. Once you’re there, you’ll likely want to eat and possibly sleep. How does that compare and can it be affordable? It is completely affordable to eat in Europe. If you have a high-end palate, whether you are in the U.S or Europe, you may find a high-end bill at the end of it, however, there is hope for good food at a reasonable price. A croissant and espresso for breakfast, a Croque Monsieur for lunch, French onion soup and a baguette for dinner, not to mention a street crepe filled with strawberry jam or Nutella while out touring during the day. You will likely be able to eat in Paris for about $25 bucks per person. Of course it does depend on what you eat and where you eat, but it can be done without a lot of stress. Tip: look for patisseries rather than full cafes for lunch’s and snacks.

3 Guys and their street crepes!

La Maison Gobert

Now that you are well on your way to Paris or parts unknown, what about lodging, where do you stay without breaking the entire travel budget? If you get a Hostel International card you can cash in on some really great room prices. Hostels are very safe, clean and a reasonable way to stay in your new favorite areas. You won’t need a membership throughout the world, but some places do require it. Just click the link above to see if you would need one where you are going, if going to France, you will need one. If Hostels are not your thing, have no fear, you can still find affordable rooms and pensions, (a small hotel). Staying in Paris can be as low as $41 a night. A good average, for easier travel planning, is about $120 a night, and that is for a decent place that serves a very good breakfast, saving you, of course, on your daily food allowance. The sky is the limit with lodging in Paris, use your imagination, stay affordable most of your trip and splurge on a night or two (some places require 2 or more nights) in a ‘fancier’ place. At the end of the day, however, it’s Paris, most of what I have found is pretty fancy.

There are apps that track prices, bloggers that do a lot of the research for you with tips and websites that are very helpful. Some that I have heard good things about include, Scott’s Cheap Flights, and Matt’s Travel tips. Not all are free and not all charge for their services, pay close attention to the button you click. I had to say that because sometimes people just buzz through the mumbo-jumbo and get charged, don’t want that happening to you.

Bottom line, stop writing notes, dreaming up the ideal situation, pack your bags and get out there. It’s time to explore.

Standing on the Bridge of Ungratefulness

It isn’t a promising notion, but it is my reality. I get really, I mean really angry at life. I don’t have much patience for even the slightest shifts in my world. I decided, unwittingly, if not unconsciously about six and a half years ago that most moving parts of everything around me can and often fail to live up to what my mind thinks they should be. I am not, at least in my opinion, a self-righteous person with ideals of superiority, however, I do feel like we could all be doing more. From the weather to the leaders, to our next door neighbors and family.

Here’s where I feel compelled to justify my words and my self righteous comment that I don’t feel any superiority over the weather or other humans. I don’t hold myself above the comment that we should all be doing more, if anything, I would call myself the leader, the constable, the king (queen) of the ‘we should be doing more movement.’ More simply put, I need to put my actions in my feet not just in my mouth.

I stand on the bridge of ungratefulness because I have shut down. As you can imagine, I really struggled with social media in November. It seemed that in November, every person on the planet was grateful for something. Grateful for things that just a day or 4 weeks ago they were busy quoting “I hate my life” songs and filling my wall with ugly emoji’s or the sky is falling meme’s. One might say that it’s great that we can, if only for a moment, a day, a month (pretend) that we are grateful for something, for anything, or universe beware, everything. But remember, I am shut down.

I have heard it said that the first step to anywhere is knowing that you need to take a step. I agree with that and the words also make me mad. I’m not really sure what I expected after 2 of my children were taken from me. Many years too soon, 2 of my 4 beautiful children, beautiful inside and out, were snatched up in the deadliest 10th of a second I have ever known. A 10th of a second, that’s what it’s been calculated to be, the difference between (possibly severe) injury and death.

Don’t be sad for me, don’t cry for me and please don’t pity me. I am not alone, where I sit in the death of children, there is a club, bigger than you’d like to imagine. A club, perhaps the only one, or one of few that swear every second of every day that we won’t allow any new members. Every moment of every day, we fail. We fail to limit the numbers of parents that bury their children. I am shut down.

I stand on the bridge of ungratefulness because of where I have been. I know that there are plenty of things, people (littles), adventures and well, life to be grateful for and maybe its not that I am not grateful. I may and possibly concede, that I am indeed grateful. Perhaps when the bed is made and the tide rolls out that I am grateful for all that I have today, but angry while I stand on the bridge of ungratefulness because I am, grateful.

{I currently have 2 biological children, 2 stepchildren, 5 littles, a cache of loyal friends, 2 cats, 1 (20-year-old) dog, and a cook’s dream kitchen. I have soared in a hot air balloon in Turkey, stood in the Parthenon in Athens, have eaten pizza in Vatican City, stayed at a spa in Tuscany, swam with the Plankton in the Aegean, kayaked off the coast of Maine, have seen a thousand year old tree in Germany, ridden a train in the south of France, climbed the stairs of the Eiffel Tower, swam in Swan Lake, had fish and chips in London, watched the sunset in the Cinque Terra, eaten a bottomless bucket of popcorn while watching really good and shitty movies, walked the halls of the Neuschwanstein Castle, ridden an airboat in Iowa, eaten the worlds best wood-fired pizza in Louisville, KY, thrown beads from a Mardi Gras float (I belong to the Krewe of Cleopatra in New Orleans) found inner peace in a labyrinth at the YMCA in Estes Park, CO, and have seen and done so much more.}

It’s Time to Buy a Swimsuit: Will it be a One Piece, Bikini or Camo

It seems like time has been swirling by so fast, one day it’s New Years and then the next it’s almost St. Patty’s Day. I keep seeing ads for bathing suits, I guess it doesn’t help that I clicked on one and now the entire internet thinks that I am really in the market for one. My social media pages are swimming in ads for bathing suits and my google searches ask if I need a suit, not really, but it feels that way.

I suppose that it is really time to start thinking about it because by the time that you need a suit you won’t be able to find one in the brick and mortar stores and online you won’t be able to find your size. If you’re on a diet and hope to lose those last 10 plus stubborn pounds or still have the whole road to go, it’s time to man up and just buy one. You could buy one in your current size and in your hope to be size to cover your bases, I mean, it’s an idea. If losing that weight determines which style you go for, just pick one in between what you’re currently comfortable with and the one you hope to wear this summer.

Now, which suit will it be… ooo-la-la or almost ooo-la-la or forget about ooo-la-la and head straight to the camo section. You could just say no to the pool, sand and all of the outdoors. No, you can’t. It’s time to buck up buttercup and do what makes you happy. Do the whole dance like nobody is watching shit. Really, at the end of the day, that’s where it’s at, doing it your style all the way.

The sane approach to this stupid ass summer tradition is to embrace it. If I sound like your crazy aunt, you know the one, she smoked pot before it was um, legal… she didn’t shave her legs before that was a thing (is that a thing) and she always let you stay up later than your folks said that it was okay… then hello honey, call me auntie.

Who do we pick our swimsuits for, ourselves? Do we pick our suits for the other women we may encounter? Oh Lordy, do we pick our suits for our husbands, boyfriends or soon-to-be(s)? Remember that all pictures that are taken of you, should be taken from the chest up, ribs up at the most or just take a picture of your toes in the sand or pool. (Add a can of beer or a frozen drink in the shot and wa-lah!) No one should ever take a full body picture in a suit, and oh my, NEVER let someone take a picture of you sitting in a lounge chair. No one passes the sit-down test, no one. (Well maybe my friend Maggie, but she’s an anomaly from Hungary that dances for a living)

Swimsuits are a way to go out in public (a legal way to be almost naked) and get into the water. If you only want to tan, by the way, that isn’t recommended anymore, doctors these days really frown on us for sunbathing. Go figure! Wait, my point was, skip the suit and get one of those really cute fit and flare dresses at Old Navy. I mean, if you aren’t ever going into the water, why put yourself through that whole swimsuit crap?

When it comes to swimsuits, well, I am kind of an addict, which is funny because I haven’t been a ‘sexy’ weight in like 10 years. I buy too many pairs of boots, designer bags, and swimsuits. The boots, I rarely wear (I’m most comfortable in leggings/shorts and flipflops), the bags, (in fear of ruining them) I rarely wear and the suits I wear all of the time and usually don’t care who cares. I will admit that occasionally, I get self-conscious and reach for a towel to cover up or just jump in the pool, but mostly, I wear me the best that I can. And that is the best advice I can ever offer. Lose the weight, don’t lose the weight… just be happy and be you.

Happy Swimming!!!!

Is Candy Food and Can I Have it for Dinner?

When I say that I don’t want any dinner because my lunch was heavy or too big, does eating a box of hot tamales count as food?

When a burger sounds too much and a salad just sounds like too much work, why can’t a box of Hot Tamales be considered dinner?

Will you argue the sugar is just too much D, Dear Lord grow up, you’re likely to fall into a deep sugar sleep. Wait, did someone say sleep? Oh heck yeah! I am past the nap is a bad idea, scream and cry in circles on the floor at just the mere mention of a nap age… bring it, Hot Tamales!

How about the workout, move your body argument, got that covered too… I watched a Bruno Mars video. Seriously, I did a thing and lifted weights, covered, right?

Oh, you want to talk about lunch, don’t panic, it was salad and soup… a wedge no bacon and chicken tortilla (served in a bowl fit for a toddler). Yes, the salad dressing was Bleu Cheese, on a sixth of a slice of a head of iceberg with some red onions and little red things, I think that they were tomatoes.

Here’s the real argument, I can make it because it’s me and I know me pretty well. I won’t feel like eating food until about 9:30 pm MST. There’s the problem with eating Hot Tamales for dinner. The doc would say it’s dangerous to eat late and go to bed right afterward.  I don’t usually lay my head on a Lavender sprayed pillow until midnight, but the theory is that one should not eat within 3 hours of eating. Why? Good question, so I looked it up. So the real answers are bladdy blah and phoey patootie! Maybe it’s like not swimming for thirty minutes after eating or maybe it isn’t but there are a million answers on the web to the question and they go in all different directions. They say don’t eat, eat, if you eat here’s what to eat and so on.  Quite interesting, actually, all of the different outlooks on eating before going to sleep. The one that I would have to agree with the most is like a trifold, it has a few layers. Eating before sleep, usually meaning late night snacking and that could mean unhealthy snacks. If you are going to eat before sleeping it should be 200 or fewer calories, I know, we COULD have Hot Tamales or Mike an Ikes, but I think the thrust of this is more in the way of carrots and hummus, a hard boiled egg and toast, that sort of thing. Then there is the digestive issue, the recommendations are to wait for your food to properly digest or you could suffer digestive problems, such as GERD and acid reflux (which I think are pretty much the same thing). The consequence of not digesting your food properly also means that you will likely not sleep well and your body needs this time to regain, rebuild and reset for tomorrow. An unrested body could, in fact, lead to a whole slew of bad things.

What have I learned, mmm… well, you don’t get fat by eating before going to bed, you get fat by not moving around and eating like you do. You should eat a low cal snack if you are munchie at night, too much and you won’t sleep well, and on top of that, you’ll have some nasty heartburn. (OH and candy can be food)

Carry on and eat Hot Tamales in moderation, but don’t give on yourself no matter what, a little lettuce, a little lean protein and a little Hot Tamale.

Is Your Friend or Co-Worker an Ass?

It’s a lifelong issue, people. We have to deal with people all day every day. Some of the people that we deal with are not people we would ever spend a minute with, let alone the hours of time we have to work with them, or get treated by them or served by them. How are we to cope with all of these people? Obviously, I am playing around a bit about people, but there is something to it if only a little.

The reason we have friends, or how we get them and keep them is because we find people, if not attracted to like-minded folks. We open our lives to people that we think are like us, who have similar thoughts, ideas and morals. Why? Sometimes not even I can guess why we let people into our lives.

People make us feel better, they bring us joy and are who we surround ourselves with to, amongst other things, ward off loneliness. But because no one is ‘us’ there will always be a slight discord, won’t there? We will always have disagreements, we will always run into that friend that is only in our lives for a season or a reason, and of course, the friend that is there for a lifetime.

What makes a friendship last? Is it honesty, telling each other how we feel whether it’s good or bad no matter the outcome? Is the key to a long friendship just settling for a friend that checks off most of the ‘needs’ boxes and ignoring everything else? Is it compartmentalizing our relationships and not forcing a good friend to sit in a box that really isn’t them? Is it having a cache of friends that we can call on when we want to have drinks or go shopping or see a movie and even do nothing? Picking only the friends for certain events that they are comfortable with and not forcing them to be friends with you in an environment that isn’t their cup of tea? Or rather expecting them to do so. And if this really is the case, why? Shouldn’t we really just concentrate on the people that enjoy all of the same things that we do? Maybe that friend doesn’t exist.

I have had many friends over the years. I have made friends with other women who felt more like family than a friend. I have opened my heart, closed my heart and been left standing in the emotional rain, for a lack of a better way to put it. I know in me that I can be a wild card. I can be your best friend, the friend that doesn’t answer the phone and the friend can go years without seeing or talking to you and pick up where we left off, good or bad, the last time we were together. I am not a perfect friend, far from it and likely less of one in the last five years. I have lost friends because I am selfish with my time and couldn’t give enough, I have said goodbye to friends over too many lies and deception and I have lost friendships for reasons I still don’t know. In the end, I miss some, so glad to have severed ties with others and wonder where some of my current friendships will lead.

If you have a friend that is more like a family member, please cherish that friendship, feed it and be honest with it. Love outwardly like you’d like to see it come back to you. Be positive that it can be what you imagine it to be and guard yourself enough to not give too much of you away.  Remember too that, to be honest, you have to accept honesty and sometimes that is the hardest of all, but if that person is important enough, you can learn to accept whatever darkened clouds come your (friendship) way. Even if that darkened cloud, from time to time, is you.

My Weight Only Bothers Me When I Get Dressed

If you haven’t made a resolution to lose weight you’re to be given an award and celebrated. If you watch even a small amount of tv, you’ve been inundated with programs, plans, scams and magical pills. That leads me to believe that everyone must be on a diet or wants to be.

Here’s my take on the whole thing. No matter how much we tell ourselves that we’re pretty or handsome there are days that we wish we were thinner, there are days when we wish we knew then what we know now. We wish that we knew eating bags of Cheetos and plates of french fries would set us on a path that would someday be so badly booby trapped we’d never find our way back to thin or thinner. As it is, we didn’t and we aren’t as thin as we would hope.

I don’t want you to think that I am a doomsday person and that I don’t think that there is any hope because I do. I know personally that it is possible to undo the damage of years on the couch devouring Cheetos and the like. I also know that it takes a lot of commitment. I once lost 42 pounds in four months and I’ve lost 19-22 pounds a million times. I like to joke that my body just likes to be this weight, truth is, I just don’t really care enough to do the work. I care when I see candid pictures of myself or when I have tried on the fifth shirt or pair of pants and just want to put my jammies back on forever.  But ultimately, I know what it takes and I like foods that don’t like me. My doctor told me recently that my blah blah’s were all over the place and essentially my body was working against itself. Wow, what a shocker. She prescribed some tablet and 4 months in I am still at the same weight, without Cheetos every day, I promise I have tried. I have tried at least 70% of the time.

At the end of the day, if you are healthy and moderately overweight, is it is okay to just sit in your skin and be content? I have said and still, even when I am putting my sweats back on, that no one at my funeral will stand up and say “if only she weighed 20 pounds less”.

No matter how you approach the weight loss thing… please do it safely, don’t binge diet or binge eat and please learn to love yourself more. 2018 is a new year and instead of listening to the ads that say it’s time for a new you, meaning a thinner you, be a new you and be happy with yourself.

Podcast: A Moment of Reflection While Sitting Down with Clint Skutchan

When Clint Skutchan asked if anything was off the table when I  agreed to be a guest on his podcast, I didn’t expect this… I had fun though, and hope to spend more casting time with him and you.

Be forewarned, there are expletives in this podcast, because once in awhile, life mandates a bad word.

Random Thoughts & Miscellaneous Bullshit: Episode 3

If you haven’t yet subscribed to Clint at 2wayc3.com check it out, from random garble to real thoughts that matter about housing, infrastructure and the world.

Thank you, Clint, for the fun time(s) and the, um… unfulfilling lunch! BAH-HA

January: The Reset Button [Life Hack Resolutions]

Am I alone here or do we all wish for a reset button now and again? Throughout the year, I occasionally feel like everything would be better if I just had a reset button. Either my coffee got cold, I washed the whites with a red garage rag or ordered southern fried chicken at a hot chicken joint instead of ‘hot’ chicken. But here’s the deal, January is here, what better time for a reset button than right now.

The new year is pretty much a ticking time bomb because, in a sense, we do believe that it can be a reset button. Why else would we set up ridiculous resolutions like quitting smoking, losing 30 pounds by spring or finding true love, right?

I get it, it’s kind of like saying ooohhh it’s Monday, a new week, a fresh start, a weekly reset button. It doesn’t help or work that way, does it? But I was thinking, we could approach this from a shallow aspect or we could open our minds and embrace the new year as if it could work.

There isn’t really a good formula for making all of the new year wishes and dreams come true, but let’s work together and create a fancy reset button of our own, with no strings attached.  We don’t need to make lists, prep meals for a week at a time or sign up for a crazy work out regime.

Here’s how we create our own reset button for the year and our lives.  We need to keep our expectations in check, from my experiences, expectations are the root of all evil, and here you thought it was money, huh?!? It makes sense, think about it, what has been in more abundance through the years, money or expectations?

This is how it all comes together for a better year, a better day, it’s time to hit the reset button. Don’t hit the reset button just because its Monday or a new year, hit it because you deserve it. You deserve to be happy, to get ahead and to come out on top for once. When you give it a go and let your actions, not your expectations, dictate your life, your ways or your path you’re sure to come up on the winning side more than not. Mumbo-Jumbo, I hear you loudly, but I’m serious. Take something small, little, tiny… take away the expectations and watch the magic happen. I don’t mean the trash, if they aren’t taking out the trash, you’ve likely conditioned them not to so that isn’t going to change, or, not to sound like a sexist, if she doesn’t cook, she likely won’t start because you’ve lowered your expectations. The bigger stuff is what matters most, it’s the expectations of our friends, family and significant others that causes us to lose sleep and smiles.

The people in our lives let us down because we set them up to do so, mostly. It’s been said that we want to be loved, liked, taken care of like we do all of those things. Whether it’s at work or home, a family gathering or at the DMV. Well, maybe not the DMV.  We think that because when they were sick and we came home from work with a video game, sick pop, and popsicles, that they will do the same kind of thing when we get sick, but they don’t.  We believe because we do all of our work and often times co-workers, stay late and work extra hours when needed, that we’ll get the promotion or raise, and we don’t. We expect that our friends will watch our dog(s) like we watched theirs, but they don’t. Oh, wait, did you see that word? Expect! Believe, think, etc… these are words that could easily have been said differently, you could easily exchange them for the word expect.

It’s awesome if we can find people to add to our lives, but to expect them to be and do things just like us, well, that’s where the trouble kicks in.  Other people will just not ever really live up to what you think they should. When you welcome someone into your life, like, love and appreciate them for what they add and don’t worry about the rest.  I’m not saying that you can’t count on anyone, you can, just don’t expect them to carry the moon to you on a silver platter, and don’t lie to yourself, sometimes we do.  At work, do your best and if you’re not happy, then find another job. Easier said than done, yes, it is, but unhappiness won’t change if the environment stays the same. We are just coming off of the holiday season and it might seem like we will all be visited by the ghosts of whatever past, present, and future, but we won’t and neither will our bosses.

Here’s the smooshy stuff… love yourself and know that you are loved. You are loved even if you feel that you are alone sometimes and that nobody gets you. We all love and execute our lives similarly, but in different ways and we all, for the most part, try and do our best. Don’t stop breathing, deeply and remember to lower your expectations, but don’t abandon them entirely.

« Older posts

© 2019 D Dennison

Theme by Anders NorenUp ↑